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Italian weddings all about food, family

By Alison Daley

In Italian weddings, the wedding day would begin with a Catholic mass in the morning. According to Italian traditions, newlywed couples get showered by rice or paper confetti as they come out after the church ceremony and greet everyone.The confetti represents money and good fortune.Once the mass has finished, the couple take photos at the church with their wedding party after which the couple rides back to their families' neighborhoods, where they spend quiet time together while the guests are preparing the reception site for the newlyweds.One old Italian superstition is that on the day of the wedding the bride is not supposed to wear any gold until wedding rings are exchanged. Wearing gold during or before the wedding is thought to bring bad luck to the couple throughout their marriage and life together. According to Italian folklore traditions, Sunday marriages are believed to be luckiest.At Italian weddings, it is customary that the best man greets everyone entering the reception with a tray of liquor. Sweet liquors are served to the women and strong drinks are served to the men before any food. The liquors are used in place of champagne to toast the newlywed couple. A common toast would be “per cent anni,” literally meaning “100 years” as if to wish the couple 100 years of life, love and happiness.Each man is given an opportunity at the reception to kiss the bride. This is meant to bring the bride good luck and also to make the groom slightly jealous.Traditional Italian wedding receptions last several hours, sometimes well into the next day. After the main course, the bride and groom stop by each table and greet their guests personally.As the bride greets her guests she carries a satin bag known as a “la borsa” into which the wedding guests place envelopes containing money. The money is commonly used toward the expenses of the wedding, which traditionally is financed by the bride's family.Throughout the reception, this purse is usually guarded by the bride's grandmother, “nonna,” or her mother. The holder of the bag is traditionally the bride, but this can vary. In some weddings the bride hangs on to the satin bag and all the men who dance with her put money in the sack. Sometimes the bride might wear it and allow male guests to put money in it in exchange for a dance with her.Italian weddings have always emphasized food. The menu at an Italian reception is nearly as important as the wedding itself. Strongly linked with family life, food is the focal point of the wedding festivities. Joyful Italian songs and wedding music will be played as happy guests heartily eat away.Sometimes dinners containing more than a dozen courses are served, many symbolizing specific foods for good luck. Traditionally there would be two to three appetizer courses, followed by two to three pasta or rice courses and then one meat and one seafood main course with side dishes all ending with a dessert and the multi-layered wedding cake.At traditional Italian weddings, there is generally a dessert table with a large cake and Italian cookies. Symbolic foods for good luck include twists of fried dough, powdered with sugar and Italian wedding candy. Espresso and pastries are served after the dinner and once everyone has had enough to eat and drink – the tarantella dance!The tarantella dance music, played by a live band, is probably the most recognized song of all the Italian folklore music. It literally means “tarantula” because the dance is done by everyone in a great big circle going clockwise until the music changes, becomes faster, and then they quickly change direction to counterclockwise. This continues several times and it is fun to see who keeps up. Generally played with a strong mandolin (Italian guitar) presence, each region has its own version.One of the things I remember most from my childhood, and I still see today, are “bombonieri,” sugar-coated almonds in plastic mesh bags.Bombonieri, also known as confetti, is a traditional Italian favor presented to guests at a wedding in appreciation of their attendance.This symbolizes the “bitter-sweet” sacrament of marriage that the couple will encounter. The number of bombonieri should be an odd number, preferably five or seven – each a good-luck number, symbolizing fertility, happiness, health, longevity and wealth.The tradition of handing out favors dates back to the Middle Ages when it was customary for the engaged couple's family to exchange favors. Since that time the bombonieri has evolved into an elaborate part of the wedding reception.Favors can range from something simple, like a small porcelain figurine, to something as elaborate as a silver frame or crystal vase. But no matter how simple or elaborate the favor, bombonieri wrapped in tulle, either tied to the favor or handed out separately, is a constant.Attached to each favor by a piece of ribbon, which can match the color of the bridal party, is a place card with the name of the spouses and their wedding date.Bombonieri tied in mesh bags is also tossed at the couple, based on a tradition to avoid childlessness.